Portrait of Maartje Groenenberg, a celebration of love. Blog by MaartjedeBoer

A celebration of love

Have you ever lost a parent? Or had to say a final goodbye?
My mother is going through the final few weeks of her physical life. She is done, and she is letting go. And my head and heart are filled with this imminent goodbye.
I had mourned losing her before when I lost her to dementia years ago. But this time, it is final. And that is a whole other thing to process. Soon there will be no more glimpses of her old self, no more smiles, no more jokes.
And there is nothing else I can think or write about. No matter what I'm doing, it's there, somewhere. There are so many angles, memories, emotions, and thoughts; it's almost like an overload. It feels like I am riding this big massive wave of emotions and can barely hold on.
But there is one thing that stands out: in the end, love rules.
We had a good relationship, my mum and me. Of course, we had our faults, we have quite a history together. I'm still processing stuff that she 'did to me', some of it from my childhood. And there is no doubt in my mind I haven't been the ideal daughter either. But we both did our best. We tried, failed sometimes, and apologized. And at times, we were just plain selfish.
Right now, none of that matters anymore. Everything has fallen to the side, and all that remains is a core of true love. I have never felt this so strongly with my mum. And with other people as well. Like a blanket of love and support, people gather around my mum and me, helping, saying their goodbyes, taking a load off me, or just being there. I have never felt so loved and seen before, so supported. Even from people I hardly know.
And I know this for sure: if we forget about all the ego stuff, the only thing that remains is love. That is our divine power.
I see this as a final gift from my mother: she is leaving us, but by doing so has shown us that there will always be love and support. What a beautiful gift, not just for me, but for everyone.
Love you mum, always!

Leave a comment

Please note, comments need to be approved before they are published.